Maintaining Your Resolve
Why Resolutions are so Tough to Keep and What You Can Do about It
By MATT PHELPS
Although plenty of New Year's resolutions have been found at the bottom of a plastic champagne flute, the tradition dates back much further than disposable cups and Dick Clark.
That late-night oath to change your life over, stop smoking or start dieting reportedly began over 4,000 years ago with the ancient Babylonians who celebrated New Year's in March as a harvest festival. The Romans moved the holiday to January, a month named after that two-faced god Janus, who has one head that looks forward and another that looks back.
You're probably wondering: In those four millenniums of resolutions, how many have been kept? Beginning with "I'll return those yaks I borrowed," research suggests only a fraction. It's as if all of us who make resolutions have two heads, one that imagines a better tomorrow, and another stuck in the habits of yesterday, holding us back.
Our brains aren't designed to quickly change tendencies, notes MIT neuroscientist Ann Graybiel. Most actions are dictated by habit. Learned automatic responses make it possible to talk on a cell phone and munch on fries while steering out of the drive-through lane. The downside of such ability is that rewiring the circuitry requires effort, and since our brain makeup is as individual as our fingerprints, each person requires a different amount of time to alter his or her behavior.
Dr. Robert Cooper, in his upcoming book 'Get Our Of Your Own Way,' explains that our brains carry a primal urge to stick to patterns that have worked in the past, even if our habits include finishing the entire bag of Ranch Flavor Doritos by the end of 'E.R.' and letting the dishes pile up until Sunday.
So what can you do to keep that resolution? Here are three of Cooper's tips:
Get past old habits in a second: The next time you're facing an old bad habit such as arguing with your spouse or buying a bag of cookies, take a pause and "reboot your nervous system." Relax your face, hands and body, and try to release as much tension as possible. Clear your mind and think of nothing. Now aim your attention back on your greater goal.
Practice fighting pressure: Will you soon be walking into a room full of smokers or facing a bottomless buffet? Train yourself with "brief installments" of pressure that will toughen the resiliency pathways in your life and work, suggests the neuroscientist. Perhaps you want to walk by a smoker and resist the urge to light up or walk into a bakery and buy nothing. This practice will make it easier to deal with the big challenges that come your way.
Envision calm effectiveness: Another way to prepare for those stressful moments is to envision yourself in a tense situation and then envision yourself handling it with ease. Whenever you imagine a better way of responding you activate the prefrontal cortex part of your brain, and the more often you do, the better your chances to change your habit.